Conquerors

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:35-39 NIV)

It would be appropriate for me to mention this is my all time favorite Bible verse, but the more I read the Bible, the more it seems that each day the verse He shows me is my new favorite. This was has been on the list for a long time though. :)

The cause of much of my stress or anguish in my life is missed expectations. I can be frustrated easily over things as simple as not eating my prepared dinner within the first 5 minutes off of the stove. When a friend lets me down or my kids are whacked out, it often isn't the act itself that send me over the edge. It is the reality of having to change the plan of what was expected. 

What have you been expecting that hasn't come or has changed what you thought reality would be along the way?

Paul's letter to the Romans reminds us that God is bigger than our plans and expectations. In all situations, we are more than conquerors in Christ and attached intimately to him. In my head, I like to replace the words with my own specific life descriptions:  not arguing kids, aging parents to care for, traveling husband, not an unexpected pregnancy nor a boss who can not keep himself from interrupting every conversation can separate me from the Love of God that is in Christ Jesus. 

Holy Spirit, come and do more in us. Be more in us and let our intimate connection to your love in Christ remind us that through your spirit, you have already made is more than conquerors. We must only choose to access that which is already given. 

Hugs, A

Immediately

^{Luke 13:10-13 (NIV)
10} On a Sabbath Jesus was teaching in one of the synagogues, ¹¹ and a woman was there who had been crippled by a spirit for eighteen years. She was bent over and could not straighten up at all. ¹² When Jesus saw her, he called her forward and said to her, “Woman, you are set free from your infirmity.” ¹³ Then he put his hands on her, and immediately she straightened up and praised God.
¹⁴ Indignant because Jesus had healed on the Sabbath, the synagogue leader said to the people, “There are six days for work. So come and be healed on those days, not on the Sabbath.”
¹⁵ The Lord answered him, “You hypocrites! Doesn’t each of you on the Sabbath untie your ox or donkey from the stall and lead it out to give it water? ¹⁶ Then should not this woman, a daughter of Abraham, whom Satan has kept bound for eighteen long years, be set free on the Sabbath day from what bound her?”
¹⁷ When he said this, all his opponents were humiliated, but the people were delighted with all the wonderful things he was doing.

For all of the dozens of times I have read this exact passage, I have moved on quickly to verses 14-17, where the synagogue leaders try to trap Jesus as someone who doesn't follow the rules because he healed her on the Sabbath.  My focus has always led me to the "dos and don'ts" of this passage if you will. Pharisees are hypocrites and I'm more important than the animals.  Got it.  On to verse 18!

Read verses 10-13 with me one more time, maybe even out loud.

¹⁰ On a Sabbath Jesus was teaching in one of the synagogues, ¹¹ and a woman was there who had been crippled by a spirit for eighteen years. She was bent over and could not straighten up at all. ¹² When Jesus saw her, he called her forward and said to her, “Woman, you are set free from your infirmity.” ¹³ Then he put his hands on her, and immediately she straightened up and praised God.

OK.  I'm so excited sitting behind this computer I barely can stand it.  Can we just look at definition of infirmity? 
 Noun.  Physical or mental weakness. 
 Synonyms: weakness, debility, failing

 My heart is so drawn to re-write this passage in my own words and make it personal.  ...and a woman was there who had been crippled by insecurity.  She hung her head and could not straighten up.  Jesus saw her and said to her, "Woman, you are set free from your weakness."....IMMEDIATELY she regained her composure and praised God.

What would your word be for today in the blank?  What are you being crippled by?  What do you need freedom from?  Jesus said that she was set free from her infirmity.  If you have accepted Jesus as your Savior, you have the power of His healing hands living inside of you every moment...the power of the Holy Spirit.   You need only to speak out what you are crippled by and surrender to the touch of the Holy Spirit.

Now, what we don't know if she had some kinks to work out from being crippled or if she might have been a little stiff.  We don't have her life story to know if there were a few times she had to wake up in the morning and do her physical therapy to make sure she didn't fall back into her ailment, although I would assume she did.  It would be foolish for us to assume that we too wouldn't have some work to do in the wake of gaining our composure.  But in that moment of being touched by the power of Jesus we are called just as the woman did.  When she knew she had been touched by God, she IMMEDIATELY straightened up AND praised God.

How many times have we been touched by God and not responded?  You are prayed over or you hear a small whisper that you know is from the Lord and we think, I'll do something about that later.  Yeah Lord, I know I'm not supposed to yell at my kids, but I'll work on it next week when my husband comes back from his business trip.  God, I know I'm crippled by jealousy of where others are in their life financially, physically, or spiritually, and once I get myself on track, I'll work on taking every thought captive.  Jesus, I know I am struggling with setting my priorities straight, but when ____________ happens, then I promise I will have the time to get it together.  IMMEDIATELY she responds by straightening up.  Where do you know you have been set free, but are making excuses or choosing not to regain your composure?  I love when Beth Moore says, "Some of you need to break free of breaking free."

Immediately is when she responds and her response, PRAISE GOD.  This is certainly an area I struggle in.  I want to call (or text) my people.  I want to share my epiphanies and my thoughts and almost certainly in those conversations God is given the glory.  But, if I am looking at this passage intently, I have to be open to the fact that it doesn't say that the woman ran home to tell her family all God did for her.  She IMMEDIATELY praised God.  

Remembering to immediately give thanks to the one who sets us free from our infirmities is key, lest we have even a moment to believe we did it on our own.  For if I have settled in my heart Who has set me free and given praise and thanks first, the overflow out of my mouth will let the light shine on the power of the Holy Spirit.  And isn't that we as believers want to do anyway?  I want the Holy Spirit to set me free from my infirmities...from my weaknesses...from my sins for my own life, but really for the bigger purpose.  So that through me, God's name can be made known.

Because of what Jesus did for the woman in this verse, it says in verse 17 that people were delighted at what Jesus was doing.  Don't we all deep down want to be a person who others look at and can be delighted in what Jesus is doing in us and for us?  In our deepest longings, aren't we all really wanting to be set free so that we can be a light to others for the path that points to Him?  That's why we feel yuck when things are out of whack; we want set free from our infirmities because we know it isn't God's best for us....which means it isn't God's best for Him.  

Today, can you ask God to search your heart?  Can you be honest with yourself about what you are allowing yourself to be crippled by?  Speak it out loud.  Then know that the power Jesus, His touch is in you.  Access it and then IMMEDIATELY respond.

Father,
I thank you for the gift of the Holy Spirit.  Thank you that we can access the Holy Spirit the second we need it and that it can immediately change us.  Help us to be people who accept your gift and Your best for us.  Prompt us to praise you first and let the overflow of what you are doing in us be our testimony to make you more known.  We love you Father.  Amen.




 



 


 



 

I Don't Get Sick

I have a cold; or the flu.  I'm not sure what I have that ails me, but it has been a rough week.  I don't get sick; ever!  I may get a headache here or there, maybe a runny nose, but that's it.  So, it has left me with very little sympathy for those who say they are sick.  Buck up...move on!  Well, this week has put me in my place.  Exhausted, barely able to shower, hard to keep my eyes open because they hurt, every muscle hurting, etc. left me searching the internet for what it must be.  The hypochondriac in me (true story that I do consider myself this from time to time) landed on that it must be fibromyalgia or lupus.  For sure.  I don't get sick, so therefore this must be something big. (to be clear, my mom did suffer from both of these diseases, which is why I felt it was plausible, in my own crazy head defense).

All the while, Jason would gently rub my back, help with the kids, and say, "this is called being sick.  No need to over think it.  Let it run its course."

To add to the exhaustion, it has been a little rough emotionally this week too.  God has placed opportunities this week that I am so grateful for, but feel ill equipped.  There are many decisions to be made and much, much more work to do after that.  The thought of stepping into some unclear territory for me, both invigorates me and scares me.  Anyone else stepping with me here?

Well, this morning I was in an emotional pool in the shower.  How can I possibly run with a ministry opportunity that I am not equipped for, shepherd the hearts of my children, be the wife I'm called to be, be involved, be a mentor, be mentored, and don't forget to exercise and have lots of quiet time?!?!  I was a mess!

My best friend sent me 2 Corinthians 12:9  (NIV)
⁹ But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me

 OK.  I get it.  But I'm still a mess here.  I know that, but how do I walk it out?  What I needed was some quiet time.  I prayed as I walked downstairs to an empty house that when I opened up to the book of Luke, that the next section I was scheduled to read would speak to me in a fresh way.  I knew I needed some fresh perspective and some lectio divina quiet time has proven itself time and again to do that trick (thanks to my neighbor our 4 year old was on a playdate).

You have to know that I'm about to share the verses from Luke that I was scheduled to read.  For the record, I've read them the last few days as well, but hadn't stopped to think on them, again, thinking I would jump on over them.


Luke 10:21-24
²¹ At that time Jesus, full of joy through the Holy Spirit, said, “I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this is what you were pleased to do.
²² “All things have been committed to me by my Father. No one knows who the Son is except the Father, and no one knows who the Father is except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him.”
²³ Then he turned to his disciples and said privately, “Blessed are the eyes that see what you see. ²⁴ For I tell you that many prophets and kings wanted to see what you see but did not see it, and to hear what you hear but did not hear it.”

Jesus had just appointed 72 to go out in pairs and preach the gospel and when they came back, they couldn't be quiet about all they saw God do through them, even driving out demons, as they returned to tell their stories filled with joy.

Then Jesus, full of joy through the Holy Spirit, thanks his father that he used the new in faith, the "little children" to do the work.  Jesus says it pleases the Father to give this joy to the workers.

Overwhelmed by everything; yeah, a little bit.  Defeated; heck no!  Walking out in relationships I feel ill equipped to keep in ryhthem (kids, hubby, friends, co workers, neighbors, etc) or a ministry mission, just opens a space for me to invite the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit to be more in me.  Because I can't do it, but He can.  Let my life be evidence of all He can do, not anything that I can do.  

This week, it is an actual ministry decision.  Next week it might be speaking into the attitude of my 8 year old or sharing Jesus with a friend who does not yet know Him.  Wherever I feel ill equipped, I want the Breath of Life to be more in me.   Like Jason said, "Angie don't overthink it."  I just want Him to do His think in me.

Will you take a moment with me now to tell God one area today that you feel ill equipped for moving forward?  Then tell him that you need Him to be bigger and be more in you.  Give yourself the space to listen for His words back to you and then be obedient.  For it fills Jesus with joy and pleases the Father to be able to do their work in us and then to do it through us.

Father,
Thank you for opportunities that make me realize it isn't all about me and I can't do everything on my own.  Forgive me when I let the enemy take a hold of my thoughts and turn my circumstances into an overwhelming mess.  Keep my eyes and my thoughts fixed on you daily.  Help me to let you do a work in me so that you can do it through me; in my marriage, in my girls, in my friends, in my small group, in my church, in my community.  Use me that I may be pleasing to you where you have challenged me, just for today.  We love you.  Amen.

 

I Said What?

For about six years now, I've met periodically with a lovely woman who has come along side of me, mentored me, and shared the wisdom of someone trying to walk out being a follower of Jesus.

We walked into a Starbucks and there sat Mary's husband Ron, with the new speaking pastor at our church, Joe.  Ron and Mary greeted each other with surprise as if they had no idea the other would be meeting there.  I find this very amusing because of the detailed schedule I try to write down for my own family.  I wouldn't want to wish my kids' years away, but I do think there will be benefits to the freedom of kids being out of the house. :)

Anyway, we went to the man table to say hello and Ron introduced me to Joe.  I think he said something along the lines of, "Hi.  Nice to meet you" and do you know what I said?  "Hi, I'm Angie and I run the mom's ministry."  To which he replied some cynical remark that sort of put me in my place, to which I can't remember, but I remember my words for the thoughts they produced.

That conversation took place a little more than 5 years ago and it is still one of those sentences I wish I could take back.  At the very least, I want someone to take me back there and smack me around a little; tell me the truth!

2 Timothy 1:9  says this: He has saved us and called us to a holy life--not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace. This grace was given us in Christ Jesus before the beginning of time,

There are about a gazillion verses on us being saved by faith and not by works or how your works justify your faith.  But do you know what that girl 5 years ago was saying?  I was saying to Joe, and believing myself, that although I wasn't saved by my works at the church, I found my identity in them.

What would I say to her now? 
"Let the Spirit change your way of thinking." (Ephesians 4:23 CEV)
"Put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." (Ephesians 4:24 NIV)

I would repeat to her to let the power of the holy spirit change her.  Let the power of the holy spirit be what she serves out of.  Let the power of the holy spirit be where she parents out of.  Let my words be more of His words.  And I would tell her to surrender whatever she finds her identity in that does not line up with it being in the power of the trinity.

I would have told myself these things every single day of the last 5 years and checked my words and motives against these verses.......and now I will attempt to ask of myself all the days of the rest of my life.

So today, what way will I let the spirit change my way of thinking?  Through the power of the holy spirit, will I think of my children as a gift, more than the two arguing girls that are annoying me?  Through the power of the holy spirit, will I choose to renew my way of thinking about my serving roles?  Will I show that they are an overflow of the relationship I have with the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit or will I live it out as if I have accomplished something on my own?

What about you?  What areas are you burn out from living out of your own energy, rather than giving the holy spirit access to do the work in you?

Father God,

You already know the areas we need to surrender.  You know where we have been doing something for ourselves or out of our own energy and we ask your forgiveness.  Give us the courage to speak it out loud and then day by day, pray that the power of the holy spirit will transform our minds.  Make our words be more of your words; our actions be overflow of you inside of us.  Breath of life, breathe into us a renewed mind and a renewed spirit.  We love you.  Amen

Deny Myself

I have had a terrible week in time management.  Staying up late to watch basketball (Indiana lost which makes it worse), doing my reading assignments for Bible study at the last minute, and sleeping until alarm time for my kids had left me grumpy and with very little quiet time with God. Couple that with a disappointment for me, an extremely hard time for a close friend, and a daughter who wants to show me her strong will, and I was downright ready to snap. By Thursday night, I was speaking firmly (aka almost yelling..just not quite) to Jason telling him I needed some quiet time with God.....like yesterday!! My man knew it before I spoke it and he encouraged me to sleep and Friday, I woke up early, and opened my Bible.

Luke 9:23 (NIV) Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.  Knee-jerk reaction to reading this passage this morning is to maybe pass over this as "just" part of the story.  I felt the guilt, so I second chose to think of it in a big terms list: deny my own money to give for the use in further God's Kingdom, deny some free time in order to serve in furthering God's Kingdom, deny my wants for the needs of others!  My brain was able to process all of that in a matter of 30 seconds and indeed, I was feeling pretty good about where I was at in denying myself.  Check and check off of my list.  Except for that part where I am supposed to sit in silence for a few minutes and ask "What is in my life right now that needs to hear this word?"  (For a girl who can tell her life story to a rock, a few minutes of silence is still a stretch for me.)  Anyone feel me on this?  What causes you to struggle to be quiet?  Does anyone else feel like it is a struggle to even find the time to have quiet, even if you wanted to?  So I shut my mouth, closed my eyes, and said, "Lord, I'm waiting here for you."

The stir in my heart came and my pen hit the paper.  When the next five minutes were over, it was evident that there was much work to be done today.  If Angie wants to be my disciple, she must deny her right to be prideful.  If Angie wants to be my disciple, she must deny her right to be angry (we are talking kids, hubby, friends, etc...not righteous anger like world hunger here).  If Angie wants to be my disciple, she must deny her right to act annoyed (insert photo of kids again).  If Angie wants to be my disciple, she must deny her right to react based on the actions, words, or choices of others.  Ugh and yay!  God speaks to me showing me He has seen just the week I've had (ugh..he saw it) and at the same time, whispers to my heart, "I love you enough to not leave you here."  I just wonder how many of my friends, how many of my family members, how many women everywhere just need to have a moment where God can whisper.  How many people skip over familiar passages without allowing them to penetrate their souls?  Where do you need to recognize that God loves you enough to not leave you in your ugh?

The list can go on (and on and on and on) for what I should be denying myself I'm quite sure.  The Holy Spirit was merciful enough to me to see the cross that I had been called to bear for the today was enough. :)  It just so happened that this afternoon, my oldest decided it would be a fine time to put what I was practicing to the test.  A small 'no' from me turned into a huge opportunity for her to lose self-control of her words and actions.  On the back end of this 45 minute episode (they say this strong willed resolve will come do great things one day for the Kingdom..fingers crossed), I get to sit here and listen to the girls happily doing crafts together.  No guilt here.  No shame for blowing it again.  VICTORY!!  All caps because I needed God to have a win in me today.  I hope that each time you get a victory, you'll turn the caps lock on, even if just for yourself.  Savor the victories God does through you.  

Father God,
Thank you for what you are trying to show us.  Thank you for friends to encourage and for sending the messages through our sisters.  "I need to do in you what I want to do through you."  Thank you for truth.  Forgive us when we choose to ignore our chance for silence or the action part of your tender whispers.  We love you and we thank you that you love us enough to change us.  Amen

I Don't Run

 

 To say I don't enjoy running would be an understatement.  For a while I tried to be a runner and even hit the career high 5k.  I feel the empowerment of the accomplishment, but the process for me  is so unbelievably brutal.  Several of my friends are people who enjoy running.  It helps them to clear their minds-release stress-get in shape-manage their kids-take over the world.  I don't get it.  But there is something I understand even less; runners who insist on running in the road when there is a perfectly good sidewalk, or better yet, a paved trail adjacent to them.   Maybe I can be persuaded if your house is in a neighborhood where the sidewalks are uneven...maybe. And only if you wear your reflective gear.

Confession: I have called the cops on a jogger in our neighborhood- twice. He jogs against the traffic, at night, and the only reflection he has (if any) are the little painted streaks they sometimes come on shoes. Give me a break. The only reason I haven't hit him myself is by the protection of God himself because I have come close enough to be able to tell in pitch black that it is in fact a male jogger.

My thought for a long time was, "What possesses that man to be in the middle of the road, in pitch black dark, where I have to believe I am not the only car about to hit him?" For a long time I didn't think about what I could do, but just, why did he (or anyone else for that matter) run in the road?

Do you ever ponder on the "whys of life for others?"  Why are you spending money you don't have?  Why are you being promiscuous?  Why do you put work before family?  Seriously, why are you making poor choices???.....Get out of the middle of the of the road!  Maybe it is just me, but then I go into fix mode.  If only people could get into Bible study, serve someone else, be more determined to break their bad cycle...if only I could help them find my Jesus, they would get out of danger and get up on the sidewalk.

For many years in my own life, I thought that part of me being a follower of Jesus was me needing to "advise" people who were in the middle of the road on exactly how to get out (ie let me help you with a budget, let me help with a balances schedule for your family, can I be a listening ear to help get you through this rough time?). Now, while all of those things might be good, they weren't going to help long term. My help is only band aid help when standing in its own.

Mark 9:33-37 (MSG)

33 They came to Capernaum. When he was safe at home, he asked them, “What were you discussing on the road?” 34 The silence was deafening—they had been arguing with one another over who among them was greatest. 35 He sat down and summoned the Twelve. “So you want first place? Then take the last place. Be the servant of all.” 36-37 He put a child in the middle of the room. Then, cradling the little one in his arms, he said, “Whoever embraces one of these children as I do embraces me, and far more than me—God who sent me.”

This story struck me fresh as I passed a jogger the other day and sat down to write this because I meditated on the verse that comes directly before this story, verse 32. It says, " They didn't know what He was talking about, but were afraid to ask him about it." Jesus had just told the disciples that the arson of Man would be betrayed, murdered, and then three days later rise. The disciples were in the presence of THE Son of Man, but they didn't know what he was saying and just were nervous to ask. So what did they do? They decided to figure out how it would affect them by talking about who would then be greatest among them.
How many of us do this with good intentions when we try to advise people on how to get out of the dangerous road? It is like we are hooking a kid leash to the jogger and dragging them onto the paved path. When I try to help those around me with band aid solutions, I am essentially saying, " Let's discuss this among ourselves." If I'm being honest, I think doing it this way puts a false sense of pride in our own abilities to fix the situation. But just like the disciples didn't understand everything in Mark 9, we also don't understand all that Jesus is trying to teach others.

What we have that the disciples didn't have during this story is the power of the Holy Spirit. We also won't know what He is saying to us unless we access the power which has been gift to us.  The power of the Holy Spirit helps us to see those in the road as Christ sees them; in need of an embrace like a child. Our job is through our actions and words, to point people to the One who can give them the embrace and then pray for them.
I'm not sure I will ever understand people jogging in the road, but I have come to the conclusion that it isn't for me to understand. If I truly believe that a jogger is in danger, I can point them to the path that is paved. Maybe next time 'll even pull over and pray for them instead of calling the cops :)

Father, Forgive us the times in our lives where we have stepped in pridefully to situations as people who thinks they have solutions. Help us to discern the line that separates us being the Jesus for others and pointing others to Jesus. Thank you for your gift of the Holy Spirit in us to be able to ask and trust that we will be given the wisdom. We love you. Amen.